Ahhhh modern life. Everyone can tell what you’re doing at all times!
By: wendy
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By: Another Mother
After TWO MONTHS of my daughter ignoring me, I finally left her a similar message last week and she actually called me back . :-)
Hope this mom heard from her kiddo, too.
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By: caitlin
God, it’s letters like this that make me so thankful that my parents could not care less if I call home or not for extended periods of time. Leave your grown children alone, ffs!
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By: ImaGrammy
Some of us like our kids. Even though I talk to my kids all the time I still send teasing emails to them and then send similar emails to me. There may be a reason your parents don’t care, Caitlin….
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By: Jen
ImaGrammy, not everyone has the same type of relationships with their family and Caitlin sounds like she appreciates the relationship she has. Perhaps the fact that they talk on Caitlin’s schedule shows how much they care because they respect her desire for her own life.
My mom used to leave these same type of message and I until we talked and I explained that this technique made me want to call even less. It’s disrespectful not to call your parents but it is also disrespectful to manipulate your children. We agreed that I would be more responsive to her calls and that she would not leave guilt-ridden messages. And, no, hiding your manipulation with humor doesn’t make it acceptable.
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By: plethora
When my mama calls me and I miss it, she assumes I’m busy or don’t have my phone on me, not that I’m ignoring her. She does this thing where she trusts me and is secure enough to know I love her. Crazy, right?
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By: plethora
I suspect your parents do care, and do in fact miss you, but feel secure enough in the mutual love between you to accept that they’re better off leaving you to your own devices.
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By: ImaGrammy
Typo: it should read “and THEY send similar emails to me”. Having a sense of humor and joking with my adult children (and they with me)should certainly not be misconstrued as “manipulative behavior disguised as humor”, Jen. We actually enjoy each other’s company and spend quality time together. Maybe YOUR Mother was laying guilt on you but don’t lay your issues at my feet.
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By: caitlin
I’m sure they do miss me too (sometimes, anyway- they’re empty-nesters now that my sister is at college). However, they don’t call me either, and when I do call, they don’t linger. I respect them for this!
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By: caitlin
Oh, totally. My parents really hate me.
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By: plethora
As my mother always says, it’d be a pretty boring old world if we were all the same.
If it works for you, more power to you.
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By: amanda
That totally sounds like my mom–I think it’s sweet and kind of makes me feel guilty I haven’t talked to Mom in a few days (because she’s out of town and ignoring my emails :P)
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By: Dunk
This sounds like every voice mail I get from my mother. I don’t get emails since she has yet to master the art of email.
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